therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
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