Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize
