Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
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