Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
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