If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Randomize
