On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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