my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
tell me about the fingering
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