yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
Randomize
