just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
sick fucks of a feather flock together
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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