This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
