The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
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