She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I just gift wrapped bread.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Randomize
