I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
there was a trapeze. enough said
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
