She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
i came on her dog
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
