I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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