We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
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