Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
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