She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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