so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
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