would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
