I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize