I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
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