Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
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