that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize
