ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
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