on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
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