dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
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