Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Randomize
