mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
