I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
Randomize
