do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Randomize
