haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
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