3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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