just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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