you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
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