Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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