She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
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