is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
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