Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
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