I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
Randomize
