He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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