I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
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