He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
What changed your mind?
Being sober
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Randomize