Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
