How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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