love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
Randomize
