I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
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