he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
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