is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Randomize
