I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
