it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize